I’m not mom-splaining anything to you

As mothers, we are constantly under attack for how we choose to parent. Under attack by strangers, family, other mothers and strangely enough sometimes even the government.

I never realized how many people thought they deserved to have a say in the condition of my son’s penises until I had boys. I never realized it was anyone’s business when I would stop breastfeeding my children, and how many people thought they had the right to comment on how “sick” it was for my 16 month old to still be nursing. My mind is BLOWN by all the people who have sudden concerns about the sleeping arrangement in my household, and feel the need to share article and stats supporting or disproving the benefits of our particular sleeping arrangements. I had NO IDEA that people would think they could tell me what I can or can’t eat during my pregnancy, particularly men who have never HAD children, or how many people think they have the right to comment on the state of my body during and after pregnancy!


You don’t deserve access to any of that information, and you have NO right to any of your judgements.

Whenever someone has told me “you bounced right back” or “you look great for just having a babby” it makes my skin crawl. Would you saw that to someone who hasn’t had a child? Just randomly drop comments about someone’s weight in casual conversation, as if they asked for your opinion (even though they certainly did NOT).

And when someone asks me if my sons are circumcised, I have to resist with every fiber of my being to ask them if their husbands are circumcised. Because THAt is how invasive that question is. And did it occur to you, as you sat up there on your high horse, that maybe I have perfectly valid reasons for choosing to or not to have my sons circumcised? Maybe I deemed it medically unnecessary, and have decided that I am not comfortable making that decision. Maybe my husband has strong opinions about it, and that effected our decision one way or another. Personally, after working as a CNA and seeing the problems that come up in long-term care situations for uncircumcised males, I can CERTAINLY see why some people choose to. But, as a mother who has thoroughly researched the pros and cons I can also understand why someone would choose not to. It’s a choice I get to make myself, and it is none of your business.

Cosleep or not, that is also MY CHOICE. As a mother, I get to make LOTS of choices. Its crazy! I get to decide when to start table food (a decision I make with my pediatrician, not some online stranger with a WedMD degree in BULL SHIT), I get to decide when to use Tylenol, I get to decide pretty much everything. Because I am raising this child, not you, and I am responsible for keeping them alive and hopefully raising them to be successful human beings.

I am done mom-splaining. I am done trying to get people to accept or agree or be impressed by my parenting. I don’t care. I’m now about to be four kids deep, and they are doing JUST FINE. 

Come at me, bro.

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